The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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