That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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