OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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