who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
