Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
