I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
