There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
