you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
