I feel like I'm in dance class right now
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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