then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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