i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
