Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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