who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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