I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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