yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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