suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
