Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
