that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
