He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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