i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
