The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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