I look better un-naked...
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
