Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Randomize
