You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
