hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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