Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
