Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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