Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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