I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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