I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Randomize
