He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
