Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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