Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
