I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
