Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
