I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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