saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
you will always have a special place in my vag
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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