I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
