Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
