this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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