from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
