I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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