hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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