I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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