i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize