He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
