:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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