Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
