I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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