I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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