Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize